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Daniel A. Miller
accepting others as they are
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“The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking.…
(Excerpted in part from Losing Control, Finding Serenity: How the Need to Control…
Guest Post by Anne Southern
Over 20 million Americans struggle with some form of substance addiction, whether to drugs or alcohol (this does not include the many million more who are also addicted to tobacco) Despite this huge body of people with direct experience of addiction, it remains a huge taboo in our society and, once clean, many people choose to hide their past as an addict from the significant people in their lives.
This level of deception and control can be hugely damaging to relationships, particularly to romantic relationships, and can make it difficult to let go and truly accept happiness. You will never truly know whether the person you are choosing to build a life with loves you for who you are until you have shown them every aspect of who you are, including the parts of your past that you are less than proud of.
Let Go of Your Shame
As we begin a year of great uncertainty, and for many, great fear and anxiety, it is important to consider what we can do to bring greater peace and serenity into our lives and those we love. For me, that begins with striving to accept people as they are and life as it is—and importantly, to do so without anger or resentment. As I’ve done in the past, formulating acceptance intentions helps me considerably in practicing acceptance.
I am presently writing a new book titled The Gifts of Acceptance. Below are a some acceptance intentions from the book related to accepting our loved ones, children, and parents.
In 2017, I intend to:
“Be grateful for all the nice things my loved one does for me”
“Accept my loved one’s personal choices”
The current divisive political climate becomes even more divisive when the political choices of our loved ones are contrary to our own. For example, what if you are for Clinton, and they are for Trump? If you are for gun control, and they support the NRA? If they want to build a gigantic wall along border to keep people out, and you feel it's a foolish idea.
How do you deal with such political disharmony between your loved one and yourself? Do you try to persuade them to change their views? (and how does that work?) Are you able to have respectful, cordial discussions with each other? Or do damaging arguments ensue? Or, is it "My way or the highway!?Contribute Your Acceptance Story to my New Book and Receive $50 plus a Free Signed Copy!
Do you have a personal story about how you accepted someone as they are--annoying traits and all? A love one, boss, parents, or estranged sibling—even a nemesis? Or a story about how your accepting an adversity (a business failure, career setback, health issue, child’s wrongdoing, or other setback) allowed you to move forward with your life in a less stressful, more positive way?
I am currently writing another book, titled The Gift of Acceptance about the profound and often unexpected benefits that are bestowed upon us when we accept people and things as they are, or the “what is” in our lives. Included in the book will be true stories from individuals who have embraced the far-reaching acceptance dynamic.
Please share your acceptance story with the book’s readers, using the questions below as a guideline. If your story is selected for the book, you will receive $50 plus a signed copy of the book one month after its formal publication.
Still feel the need to control too much in your life? Setting intentions for letting go of control is one of the best ways in which to reduce the need or compulsion to control people and things and enjoy the serenity that is sure to follow. Below are my updated decontrol intentions for 2016 together with links to prior posts on the particular subjects.
I intend to:
Identify the fears and anger behind my need to control—and timely process them!
Trust that my ones and children will make decisions that are best for them
Let go of the things that I cannot meaningfully change
Practice acceptance in all my affairs If you don't control, you can flow--and that's true with love as well. …
Have you set your intentions for 2015 yet? Because of their importance to…