Valentine’s Day is just around the corner. What better time to focus on acceptance tips for a stronger relationship and to enhance the “Love Flow.” Practicing acceptance with your loved one leads to greater trust, intimacy, and a deeper bond. By committing to these three acceptance tips and queries*, you can enhance your love flow and create a more soulful connection this Valentine’s Day!
1) Don’t try to change your loved one: When you try to change your loved one, you are not accepting them as they are, which severely dampens the love flow. We are communicating to them that they are not good enough. That they fall short. Who wants to feel that—particularly in matters of the heart? Hence, accept your partner for whom, what, and how he or she is, rather than trying to “mold” him/her to suit your perceived needs.
Thomas Merton (a monk, writer, poet) in No Man Is an Island explains this well: “The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise, we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them.”
When you find yourself trying to change your loved one, ask yourself: What is the reason or motive behind my action?
2) Reduce your expectations of your loved one: Expecting too much from our loved ones obstructs the love flow. High expectations lead to disappointment, resentment, and disconnect. It pressures them to be other than who they are. Underlying many of our expectations are core needs we look for others to fulfill.
It can help reduce your expectations, if you ask yourself this: Are my needs something that my loved one can realistically fulfill?
3) Honor your loved one’s choices: All people, including our loved ones, have their own life path and are entitled to make the choices and decisions that influence and ultimately determine that path. We can sincerely and lovingly want what’s best for them, but we cannot truly know what is best for them. That’s because we look at things through our own history and filters, not theirs. It is important to practice humility.
When you are tempted to try changing your loved one’s choices, ask yourself this: Am I honoring their choices?
Try these three tips this week (and in the future!) and I am confident your Valentine’s Day will shine brighter with an enhanced love glow.
In the meantime, remember to,
Let It Go–and Accept “What Is!”
Danny
*I explore these and other tips (and prompts) in my forthcoming book, The Way of The Wave: Nature’s Model for Navigating Life’s Currents. The ebook version can be pre-ordered for only $2.99 here
Discover more from Daniel Miller
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.